Conquer your Anger
Our ancient mythologies are full of stories on anger and its effect. A story that stands out in Mahabharata about the devastating effects of anger is Dhritarashtra’s wrath when the Pandavas come to meet him after defeating the Kauravas. Dhritarashtra is filled with anger within, more so for Bheem as he killed Duryodhan. Dhritarashtra calls Bheem closer to embrace, ostensibly to congratulate him on the victory. Krishna, ever the wily and wise, holds Bheem back. Instead, he places before the blind Dhritarashtra, a solid metal statue of Bheem and the vigorous hug of the old man reduces the statue to rubble. Such is the vigour of the anger that burns inside him. And when he realises what he has done, he breaks down like a child.
If history is any indication, leaders, generals and athletes, who were driven by anger, tend to not only fail over a long enough timeline, but they tend to be miserable even if they don’t.
Sometime in 2009, my sister was in town and we decided to go out for dinner. I was waiting at the traffic signal at Sarita Vihar on way to a Mall in Noida and a car came from behind and hit me. I got out of my car, pulled out its driver and started bashing him like we see in Hindi Movies. After hitting him for ten minutes or so I left him bleeding all over. In another incidence, while returning to the car park after a dinner with at a fast food chain, and my cousin realised he forgot his cell phone at the cafe. We rushed back. As expected, the phone was not on the table we had occupied and was switched off. I could sense looking at one of the employees that he must have stolen it. I didn’t even ask him anything and started hitting him hard banging his head on the table top. He confessed to stealing the phone and gave it back. I beat him so bad that he could have died that day.
For few years I lived such anger-filled life. I had broken my home TV, glass doors hurting myself. Stress from work was spilling out in the form of anger on others. After such repeated incidents, my wife and I decided that I should visit a counsellor and seek help. It took 12 weeks of counselling for me to finally emerge out of this mess. Those 2 years were the worst phase of my life.
We go through many situations in life which cause emotions of anger inside us. This anger comes out in the form of outburst on trivial things. It negatively effects relationships. Many times with some of our family members or friends or even in some other unimportant interactions, we are tested by our anger. Many researches in the world show how anger is harmful for our health. Illnesses like blood pressure, heart attacks, insomnia, back aches and other problems like digestive disorders, are caused by angry outbursts. Anger is a weakness and you lose respect with it. You lose cooperation and love from people.
Like many of us, I used anger as a weapon in, what we sometimes call, controlling people, forgetting that it is not possible to control people, but it is easy to influence them. Influencing people is always easier and that can take place with peace and love and keeping good wishes. Anger ultimately blocks us from whatever goal we are trying to achieve. Anger can never make you content and happy. Anger is counterproductive. Many a times, anger comes from the overblown sense of self-importance. Often, we also get angry to get attention.
You may be exercising regularly. As a health-freak, you may be routinely consuming protein and vegetables and getting good 7 to 8 hours of sleep every night. Despite all the care, your body develops bouts of illnesses. The question that would come to your mind – What more should I do to lead a healthy lifestyle? Always know our feelings and thoughts create a subtle energy body. While diet, sleep and exercise influence physical health, a clean energy body is needed to sustain a perfect physical body. Emotional stress and anger manifest as an illness in our physical body. Release past hurt. Forgive people to heal yourself. Remain calm and stable to cleanse the body. We have the power to create a healthy mind, which then creates a healthy body and a happy life.
If you are patient in one moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow.
December 26, 2021